Abusive balloon happy customers

the original abusive balloons

These are real, inflatable balloons that will arrive by post, anywhere in the world. This is no joke.

Funny-christmas-decorations-balloons-bah-humbug

Bah Fucking Humbug Christmas Balloons (Pack of 5)

£4.00

5 x black Christmas balloons with the phrase “Bah Fucking Humbug”.

Perfect for a stocking filler or secret Santa gift.

Funny-christmas-decorations-balloons-festive-as-fuck

Festive as Fuck Christmas Balloons (Pack of 5)

£4.00

5 x red balloons with the phrase “Festive as Fuck”.

Perfect for a stocking filler or secret Santa gift idea.

Rude-christmas-decorations-balloons-merry-fucking-christmas

Merry Fucking Christmas Balloons (Pack of 5)

£4.00

5 x green balloons with the phrase “Merry Fucking Christmas”.

Perfect for a stocking filler or secret Santa gift idea.

Rude Christmas balloons secret santa

The Christmas Megapack Collection (Pack of 18 balloons)

£8.00

If you are stuck for a Secret Santa gift or a stocking filler then why not get your hands on a bumper pack of rude Christmas balloons.

Featuring:

6 x Green “Merry Fucking Christmas”
6 x Red “Festive as Fuck”
6 x Black “Bah Fucking Humbug”

Funny Christmas balloons secret santa stocking filler

The Christmas Collection (Pack of 9 balloons)

£5.00

Say what you really feel about Christmas parties with these rude balloons. Ideal for Secret Santa or as a stocking filler.

3 x Green “Merry Fucking Christmas”
3 x Red “Festive as Fuck”
3 x Black “Bah Fucking Humbug”

You're leaving - thank fuck offensive balloon

‘You’re Leaving…Thank Fuck’ Balloons (Pack of 5)

£4.00

5 x black balloons with the phrase “You’re Leaving, Thank Fuck” written on it in white.

Perfect for that much loved work colleague who is moving on to pastures new.

You are dead to us now abusive offensive balloons

‘You are dead to us now’ Balloons (Pack of 5)

£4.00

5 x black balloons with the phrase “YOU ARE DEAD TO US NOW” written on it in white.

Perfect for that much loved work colleague who is moving on to pastures new.

bitch balloon

‘Bitch’ Balloons (Pack of 5)

£4.00

5 x black balloons with the phrase “Bitch” written on it in white.

For that special someone in your life.

Abusive party balloons

Let’s look at our phones (Pack of 5)

£4.00

5 x black balloons with the phrase “Let’s separately look at our phones, every night, until one of us dies” written on it in white.

Perfect for the one you love on Valentine’s, an anniversary or engagement.

Will arrive deflated.

 

Offensive abusive rude party balloons

If I were a serial killer (Pack of 5)

£4.00

5 x black balloons with the phrase “If I were a serial killer, you’re the one I’d keep in the fridge” written on it in white.

Perfect for the one you love on Valentine’s, an anniversary or engagement.

Will arrive deflated.

 

Bridezilla - funny wedding balloons for photobooths

Bridezilla x10

£6.00

Pack of 10 white latex balloons with the phrase “Bridezilla”

Perfect for a photobooth, or scattered around the venue.

Will arrive deflated.

Funny wedding balloons - congrats or whatever

Congrats or Whatever x10

£6.00

Pack of 10 white latex balloons with the phrase “Congrats or Whatever”

Perfect for a photobooth, or scattered around the venue.

Will arrive deflated.

Funny offensive wedding balloons for photobooths - free bar

Free Bar balloons x10

£6.00

Pack of 10 white latex balloons with the phrase “Free Bar (also a wedding)”

Perfect for a photobooth, or scattered around the venue.

Will arrive deflated.

Funny wedding balloons - the old ball and chain

The Old Ball & Chain x10

£6.00

Pack of 10 white latex balloons with the phrase “The old Ball & Chain”

Perfect for a photobooth, or scattered around the venue.

Will arrive deflated.

Funny abusive wedding balloons til death do us party

‘Til Death do us Party x10

£6.00

Pack of 10 white latex balloons with the phrase “Til Death do us Party”

A wedding is all about the party right? Get the formalities out the way then let’s get smashed on the free booze.

Perfect for a photobooth, or scattered around the venue.

Will arrive deflated.

old cow balloons

‘Old Cow’ Balloons (Pack of 5)

£4.00

5 x black balloons with the phrase “Old Cow” written on it in white.

For that special someone on their special day.

Old Git Balloons

‘Old Git’ Balloons (Pack of 5)

£4.00

5 x black balloons with the phrase “Old Git” written on it in white.

For that special someone on their special day.

'You are a waste of blood and organs' Balloons (Pack of 5)

‘You are a waste of blood and organs’ Balloons (Pack of 5)

£4.00

5 x black balloons with the phrase “You are a waste of blood and organs” written on it in white.

For that special someone in your life.

bastard balloon

‘Bastard’ Balloons (Pack of 5)

£4.00

5 x black balloons with the phrase “Bastard” written on it in white.

For that special someone in your life.

Worst human ever balloon

Worst Human Ever Balloons (Pack of 5)

£4.00

5 x black balloons with the phrase “Worst Human Ever” written on it in white.

For that special someone in your life.

Valentines Love Balloons

I Thought it was Love Balloons (Pack of 5)

£4.00

5 x black balloons with the phrase “I thought it was love, but I just needed a poo” written on it in white.

For that special someone in your life.

'Another Year Closer' Balloons

‘Another Year Closer’ Balloons (Pack of 5)

£4.00

5 x black balloons with the phrase “Another Year Closer to the Sweet Release of Death” written on it in white.

For that special someone on their special day.

Happy Fucking Birthday balloon

Happy Fucking Birthday Balloons (Pack of 5)

£4.00

5 x black balloons with the phrase “Happy Fucking Birthday” written on it in white.

For that special someone on their special day.


“Fabulous abusive dark and wrong…love them”
Maggie Cuzak


“Huge hit! Quality product and fast ship. Will purchase again!”
Julie Wright


“Will definitely buy from Lead balloons again.”
Hannah Hamer


“Just as described ^.^ the birthday boy was delightfully offended.”
Supermarioqueen


“It helps make a birthday UNIQUE. Thank you again”
Soniaali3


“He loved them as did everyone else”
Heather Low

We have made our abusive balloons as dark and bleak as possible. Don’t bother taking brightly coloured standard balloons. Where’s the fun in that? Be different. Create a talking point at any party.

The original abusive balloon company, with all original designs. Accept no imitations.

So whether it be Christmas, birthdays, Valentine’s or weddings, we have the right balloons for you.